Two Ways to Deal with Internal/Heart Issues
Recently, I googled "how to be more self-confident," out of curiosity.
And what I found were posts on returning to yourself. Wearing clothing that makes you feel confident. Laughing things off. Faking confidence until you feel it.
And honestly, I had my doubts.
- First of all, let me define "internal/heart issues" -
Ever since the fall, when sin entered the world, Satan has been attacking every person. Some of his best tactics are sliding sin under our skins—so to speak, feeding off the lies that we believe about ourselves and others. Just like how he instilled doubt of God's goodness in Eve.
So by internal/heart issues, I don't mean a broken limb or cavities or something physical. I mean something internal. Self-consciousness, anxiety, doubt, insecurity, fears, grief, etc. They're what happens inside of us, things that determine our actions (or lack thereof). I'm sure we've felt them at one time or another. Of course, each issue has its own symptoms and whatnot, but I won't be addressing each one in this post. Instead, I'll be focusing on how the world tries to tell us how to deal with those problems vs. how God does.
- One way to deal with internal/heart issues:
the world's way -
Reading the list of ways to "fix yourself" made me ever so much grateful that the truth we as Christians hold to isn't grounded in the world and a bunch of articles scattered on the internet. It's grounded in the Bible.
Here's a list of some other ways secular sites suggest dealing with internal issues:
Challenging negative thoughts. Just tell yourself those thoughts don't matter, or brush them off with a default "utterly ridiculous" response.
Wear clothing that makes you feel confident. Avoid clothing that makes you feel sad or brings up those bad internal feelings.
Laugh things off. Whenever negative thoughts creep up, just laugh at them.
Act like you're totally fine, as though those problems don't exist. Then they'll probably disappear.
Do any of those sound appealing to you?
- The problem with the world's way -
As a Christian, these methods suggested on the internet sounded flimsy and temporary—if they work at all. They're not guaranteed to work. Now, I'm not saying these methods don't work, but just reading these articles made me realize how the world tries to cure issues that grow roots deep into people's hearts.
Let me break down what I mean.
The world tries to cure these internal heart issues by improving ourselves outwardly, and making the person inside feel like they really are overcoming their problems, rather than really getting to the root of the issue. It's like ignoring a cavity and covering it with teeth whitener. But that cavity's still there, just under the surface.
As humans, it's much easier for us to cover our internal/heart issues by talking and acting like we've got it all together. I know I've done this too often before. We hold our cavities to ourselves, refusing to go to a dentist, and instead cover it with a little teeth whitener and tell everyone that we're fine. When in reality, covering it up makes the cavity grow even more.
Weird metaphor aside, what can we do to uproot those internal/heart issues, instead of hiding them?
- Second way to deal with these issues: God's way -
It's comforting to know that God already knows what each one of us is going through. He sees through our facades.
King David knew this. In Psalms 139:4, he wrote:
Even before a word is on my tongue, behold, O Lord, you know it altogether.
And in 1 John 3:19-20:
By this we shall know that we are of the truth and reassure our heart before him; for whenever our heart condemns us, God is greater than our heart, and he knows everything.
Healing will come through admitting our problems and laying them down at His feet. But of course, before that, we must recognize our heart issues. We need to stop using teeth whitener and recognize we have a cavity. And obviously, go to the dentist! 😆 😉
In writing and developing positive character arcs (which shows the main character growing throughout the story in a positive way), we call these issues the Lie the character believes. Whether it's they feel they're unworthy of love, that they're ugly, or something else, it affects the way they view themselves and the world, and it tears them apart.
For example, in my book, Shards of Sky, the Lie Jenn believes that a) she's a nobody and is unable to do anything to change her and her brother's horrible living conditions, and b) her now-mute brother is standing in her way of everything she wants in life, and he's only a burden she has to take care of.
It's the same way in life—though we probably have more complicated Lies we believe.
We need to look our Lies in the eye, instead of taking the world's way and acting like we've got it all together. We need to stop saying "I'm doing well" when we're really not. We need to stop relying on clothing to act confident and looking to worldly articles for our advice. We need to admit something, even to ourselves. That we have problems. And we need to constantly be praying. Praying for God to help us through everything. Giving those problems to Him, because we cannot bear them alone. It's like admitting to a dentist that you have a cavity.
And sure. Maybe there won't be an instant, magic fix—like a filling or an extraction for teeth—but rather, it will take time and prayer. But this is a more reliable way than what the world throws at us. And it's a first step. And it's showing reliance on God.
So, in conclusion, don't cover up your problems. Don't lie to yourself about them. The path to healing may be hard at times, but God's right by your side. He will guide you through this, and all it takes is one first step and being honest with yourself and Him. So don't give up.
- What do you think about the world's way vs. God's way? Did anything, in particular, stand out to you?
I'd love to hear your thoughts! -
Drop a comment below and let me know! I love hearing from you. :)
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